I’m not much eager to write this blog post. The reason being is that I feel like I didn’t accomplish enough and utilize my time today.
I had set out a goal for myself from yesterday. But I half-assed my way through it. Meaning I put like 30% effort into it. And I didn’t even complete side task like getting up early or hitting the gym.
And very likely, tomorrow will be the same. Sometimes I feel quite hopeless about myself. It’s pathetic, I know. I keep sabotaging myself, like something is blocking me from actually putting in the work.
Or may be I should realize that is also an excuse and I should face the actual truth: I was lazy today. I was lazy when time is precious. And I will pay for today. I will regret not having worked towards my goal, not being more resilient, more couragous, more determined.
Both of those explanations point toward the same solution though: work harder tomorrow.
I have laid out the work on the table. The first thing I would do when I woke up is look at it for 15 minutes.
Gym is secondary. Taking a piss is secondary. Brushing my teeth is secondary. Waking up early or going to school on time is secondary.
That paper is the most important thing in my life in the morning, which is due in about 5 hours.
GOOD THINGS THAT HAPPENED TODAY: i got upgraded at Lotteria. Cared for by mom. It’s not so hot.
GOOD THINGS THAT I DID: spend an hour working toward my task. Take a decent shower. Writing this post even though doesn’t feel like it.
THINGS I CAN IMPROVE: block out 3 hours for the most important task.
THINGS I’M GRATEFUL FOR: My inspiring Math teacher. My mother’s caring.
DAILY JOURNAL #19
TINY FLAT. 1 AM. 05 05 17