There are only 3 weeks between me and the most important day of my life so far.
I remember not long ago I used to think I still have plenty of time. 200 days. 100 days. 50 days. Now. 21 days.
I procrastinated a lot through those day. I keep thinking that there is still plenty of time. There is always a tomorrow, right?
But the closer I get to the examination, the more I realize it’s just a lie I’ve been feeding to myself. There is no someday, there is only today. There is no tomorrow, there is only now.
And if now always think about not now, there will be no time.
Easier to understand than to apply.
I just procrastinated for one hour. I did nothing. Why? I have no clue. I guess it’s something we can’t rationalize.
I can only do. There’s a choice: to keep arguing, convincing that narrative in my mind, or ignore it and put myself into the work.
After writing the previous sentence, I jumped right in writing my essay. I have finally finished it. Exactly at midnight, but not after I have procrastinated for 2 more times though.
It seems that my mind can’t stay focus for that long yet. After about 30 minutes, I find myself easily distracted. Oh, put the phone away too. It will distract you for sure.
So I figure, even in writing, I should take a short break, about 5 minutes. Back in 30 minutes, out in 5.
Here’s what going to happen tomorrow:
I wake up when my mother calls me. I immediately meditate, because that will be my 8th day now. It’s 7.20 in the morning. I get dressed up and go have breakfast with mom. It’s been a while since I eat breakfast.
From 8 A.M to 11 A.M, I lock myself into my room with nothing but my watch, my Math Paper. And I beat the shit out of that lil bitch. 3 hours with breaks. That keeps me sharp.
11 A.M, I’m mentally drained but I feel accomplished. I have setting up lunch.
After eating lunch is a tricky time. I usually slip in those hours, easily got into procrastination. So I sleep and wake up with my mom. She’s enjoying her son spending time with her.
It’s 2 P.M. I pack my shit. Read until 2.45. I get on the bus, it leaves at 3. I get off and walk home. It’s 5. I shower to freshen up and go eat a banh my.
Class is out at 9. So I still have plenty of energy left in me. I go home and figure out what basic Math formula still bothers me.
Chưa thuộc sin 2 góc, cos 2 góc, khoảng cách giữa điểm với đường thẳng, 2 đường chéo nhau.
DAILY JOURNAL #44.
00H13 01 06 2017